"It Was Shocking And Disgusting": Women Are Sharing The Exact Moment They Realized "Oh… This Is So Over," And It’s Brutal

Although I've been beauteous overmuch wholly azygous for the past twelvemonth and a half, similar astir big women, I cognize what it's similar to place reddish flags. We've each been there: making excuses for a antheral (barfffff), lone to abruptly recognize we merit better. Even if "better" is simply being unsocial — and, spoiler alert, IT IS.

So precocious connected Reddit, women shared their brutally honest answers to the question, "What was the 'last straw' that made you autumn retired of emotion with a partner?" — and the responses marque maine wanna beryllium azygous everlastingly and ever:

1. "He told maine his person was crashing astatine our location due to the fact that helium had problems astatine home. I was moving a nighttime displacement astatine the time. When I yet got home, they were ace precocious connected drugs, and erstwhile my fellow had passed out, his person tried to get with me. Fast forward, and it turns retired that his person didn't adjacent person 'problems astatine home' — my fellow had invited him implicit for drugs and a threesome (that I was not alert of oregon had agreed to)."

–Lykkel1ten

2. "For the 4th twelvemonth successful a row, helium forgot our dating anniversary. I got him gifts each year. We were dating for 4 years, truthful he'd forgotten each azygous time. He told maine helium didn't cognize it was important to me. But if it wasn't important, would I person gotten him truthful galore gifts? Then, during our breakup conversation, helium apologized, saying helium should person remembered our anniversary, and past proceeded to springiness maine the incorrect date. Sometimes it feels similar a atrocious joke."

–Human-Complex4435

"He forgot our five-year anniversary, which truly wounded my feelings. Then I sat down to truly deliberation astir it, and I realized that I was always the 1 to retrieve the day and marque plans for past anniversaries.

I dumped him the adjacent day."

–Mickeymoose1990

3. "He would archer maine that helium wasn't funny successful enactment close now, but helium would beryllium 'up for it later.' Then, erstwhile I would marque an beforehand aboriginal that evening, helium would cull immoderate conception of enactment with me, saying that my timing wasn't right, that I had made him aggravated astatine immoderate constituent earlier successful the night, oregon that I didn’t effort hard capable to crook him on. It turns retired that helium was hiding a porn addiction, and would blasted maine erstwhile it ne'er happened truthful that helium could fell his addiction. It was a colossal mind-f*ck that destroyed my aforesaid esteem, and I wholly stopped loving him."

–makeupandjustice

4. "There were 2 'last straws.' First, for Christmas, helium said helium didn't person a batch of wealth since helium was paying his ain mode done school. I wholly understood, truthful we agreed to hand-make each other's gifts that year. I spent hours contacting each of his loved ones — friends, family, teachers from precocious schoolhouse — to springiness maine photos of them together, and to constitute retired their favourite representation with him. I filled a 200-page scrapbook with truthful overmuch love. He bought maine slippers a size excessively small. I tried to interruption up with him aft that, but helium begged and sobbed that helium would enactment much effort in. Months later, I was yet astatine the extremity of my enactment with our relationship. I tried to archer him that I wanted america to speech astir our relationship, but helium called maine an idiot. I virtually felt an invisible drawstring drawback betwixt the 2 of us. Name-calling is an implicit deal-breaker for me, and I ended it instantly aft that. No magnitude of sobbing oregon begging could bring maine back."

–worstgurl

5. "In our arguments, helium would outcry instantly to get maine to halt trying to archer my broadside truthful helium could 'win.' When I wouldn't stop, helium would instantly halt crying, and would invalidate my feelings by asserting I was arguing conscionable to reason him. Also, helium tried to initiate intimacy erstwhile it was disconnected the array owed to wellness issues and I was 90% asleep, truthful I conscionable grumbled erstwhile helium kept trying. Cue a agelong silence, followed by him punching the furniture down me, and cursing astatine maine nether his breath. He slammed the doorway arsenic helium near the room, afloat waking maine up."

–crab_ragoon

6. "He didn't ablution each day. I didn't person a large occupation with it until 1 day, erstwhile I was astir to buss him, and instantly smelled thing similar poop. I couldn't get adjacent to him anymore due to the fact that of the smell. I broke up with him close away."

–outerFoxie

7. "He threatened to telephone his ma during an argument. We were arguing astir wherefore I felt powerfully that the kids should spell to backstage school. He turned it into 'you don't admit maine enough' and 'if this speech keeps going, I whitethorn person to marque a call.' To whom? 'My mom!' I volition ne'er recognize their toxic mother-son dynamic. There was nary going backmost aft that — large ick factor. I drew up the divorcement papers myself, and had everything last and signed by a justice 3 months later."

–Flashy-Tax-4103

8. "I was on-and-off with a fellow for astir 4 years. He would perpetually travel back, lone to permission maine for idiosyncratic else. My last straw was erstwhile helium decided to 'finally change' (for the thousandth time) and wanted maine to determination successful with him. He asked maine to beryllium a stay-at-home woman arsenic agelong arsenic I continued my studies, and I agreed. Not adjacent a week later, I recovered retired that portion helium was attempting to determination maine into his place, helium had a woman the full time. They're inactive unneurotic to this day."

–Sorry_Magazine3633

9. "He told maine that I said 'I emotion you' excessively overmuch and it wasn't peculiar anymore, truthful I should 'save it for peculiar occasions only.' This was aft being unneurotic for 3 years, and — arsenic idiosyncratic who is precise unfastened with expressing affection, some physically and verbally, to partners, friends and household — it broke my heart. Luckily, astir a twelvemonth aft I broke up with him, I met my now-husband. We person been unneurotic astir 8 years, and we accidental 'I emotion you' to each different virtually a twelve times a day."

–Jooles95

10. "He hardly enactment effort into our narration and our shared household chores. As a moving person, I was overwhelmed with balancing my stressful enactment beingness and idiosyncratic life, wherever I felt similar a azygous genitor caring for a fully-grown big child. So erstwhile things boiled over, I wasn't blindsided; I knew what was coming, and erstwhile we broke up, I really took a breather. He had a filthy manner that I had to support up with, and helium refused to woody with it himself, alternatively opting to subconsciously dump it connected me. That's erstwhile I realized this was doomed from the start."

–PrestigiousStick7438

11. "He was surviving with his mom, and she started dating this feline with an ankle monitor. They told maine it was due to the fact that helium had a DUI, but it didn't beryllium close with me, truthful I Googled his name. It turns retired helium was a convicted rapist and conscionable got retired of situation aft 8 years. My ex was wholly good with lying to me, supporting his mom, and surviving with this guy. It was shocking and disgusting and they brought this antheral astir us. She ended up marrying the guy, and my ex and his full household look to person nary contented with it. Huge slug dodged."

–unicorns3373

12. "We got successful a combat astir the caller puppy helium forced america to get. He called maine brainsick astatine the apical of his lungs and slammed the doorway unfastened and done the wall. I near with the canine 2 days later."

–samnicjc

13. "It became evident that helium didn't attraction astir anyone but himself. He showed outward contempt for my success, sabotaging a enactment celebrating a milestone beingness lawsuit for me. Then, helium forged my signature to concern a luxury car that we did not request and couldn't afford. It was a mindset alteration for maine to spot that helium wasn't conscionable a bumbling fool making mediocre choices (which is atrocious enough), but was intentionally and maliciously undermining me. The realization that I was being played came abruptly and precise clearly, and I mislaid each respect and emotion for him then. Leaving him ushered successful a full caller and amended beingness for me."

–Firm-Raspberry9181

14. "I yet worked up the courageousness to archer him I was having suicidal thoughts, and his effect was that helium knew. He'd known for years but assumed I was beardown capable to woody with it and didn't request help."

–Lady_Stark

15. "After months of cheating and the guise of 'sex addiction' to excuse his actions — and months of seeking therapy — helium told maine 1 night: 'I'll ne'er person enactment with you if you proceed to look similar that.' So I near that nighttime and ne'er saw him again. My divorcement decree conscionable came successful the message 2 months ago!"

–Sensitive_lover

16. "I was moving 3 jobs, perpetually trying to support our heads supra water, whilst helium was struggling. Our eight-year day came astir and I asked him to signifier thing that we could bash that was free, similar a picnic astatine the parkland with nutrient successful our fridge, oregon movie marathon astatine location — conscionable something. Our eight-year day came around, and helium had thing planned. I had taken the time disconnected enactment to bash thing with him, truthful I ended up organizing it all, a afloat time out. When we got backmost home, I conscionable kinda sat with my thoughts. Valentine's Day came around, and I conscionable wanted a hand-written card, but helium couldn't adjacent bash that. I was devastated, and aft disclosing this to my friends and family, I realized it's not what I deserved. I couldn't adjacent get a paper written for me! I needed to yet enactment myself first. So I ended it."

17. "I recovered retired helium had intersexual relations with his stepsister arsenic teenagers. She started bragging astir it to her friends aft we broke up this past June, and well, the grapevine yet got backmost to me. I asked him if it was true, and helium said, 'I don't retrieve that happening.' I said, 'I deliberation I would retrieve whether oregon not I f*cked my sister.' And erstwhile I said that, helium yet admitted that helium did."

–Ok_Class6685

18. "His gramps was having country crossed the country. I was trying to program retired however we could spell implicit determination to assistance afterwards. I'm a caregiver successful the specialty that helium was having country in, and I was successful schoolhouse and moving astatine the time, but I was inactive consenting to fig thing retired since I adored his grandparents. My now-ex-husband looked astatine maine similar I was nuts and said, 'Why would we spell implicit there? It's not a holiday.' He couldn't fathom helping idiosyncratic post-op. I don't cognize wherefore I was surprised; helium hadn't helped maine aft my 1 country and 2 atrocious injuries. His ma had warned maine anterior to the wedding that helium was selfish, but I didn't listen. I conscionable thought since he'd known his grandparents his full life, he'd attraction more. I realized past that if helium didn't attraction astir his ain grandparents who he's known for 30+ years, helium would ne'er attraction for maine the mode I needed. I filed for divorcement the adjacent week."

–Blahaj_shonk_lover

19. "After 10 years of doing EVERYTHING — each the shopping, cooking, cleaning, favored care, booking appointments, buying gifts for his family, readying holidays, etc. — my precise past straw was toilet paper. It was during the pandemic, and helium was fto spell from his job. He did nothing; helium slept until 1 p.m. and stayed up til 4 a.m. playing video games. Meanwhile, I was exhausted, moving 12-hour days from location and not having clip for immoderate existent breaks (any interruption I did get, I had to locomotion the dog). One day, we ran retired of toilet paper, truthful I asked him to bargain some. His response? 'Can't you get it connected your break?' Mind you, determination was a country store a five-minute locomotion away. He refused to bash it. I had to articulation a gathering connected my telephone and locomotion to get it myself portion successful the meeting. It was astatine that constituent it genuinely sunk successful that helium conscionable didn't springiness a azygous f*ck astir me. He didn't attraction that I was exhausted, and didn't effort and marque my beingness adjacent the tiniest spot easier."

–jessicaaalz

20. "We were the aforesaid age, but helium was truthful childish and immature that it felt similar I was handling his teenage temper tantrums. Every clip I'd inquire him for assistance with household chores oregon anything, he'd sulk similar a four-year-old. The past straw was erstwhile I was connected an important telephone telephone extracurricular connected the driveway, due to the fact that helium was playing large video games wrong and I needed quiet. But suddenly, helium came extracurricular and started bugging maine connected purpose. I waved him distant with my manus and walked disconnected a spot further. When I ended the telephone and went to travel backmost inside, he'd locked maine out. He was wrong sulking. Luckily, I had my car keys successful my pocket, truthful I conscionable left."

–aquietkindofmonster

21. "I had a Christmas ornament creation debut that I'd been preparing for months, and helium said he'd come. It was a tiny debut, but it was a large woody to me. He not lone bailed astatine the past infinitesimal to bent retired with different friends — who could person travel to the amusement excessively — but helium ne'er went to spot it successful the period it was connected display."

–Magg5788

22. "We had started couples counselling, and our counsellor recommended idiosyncratic counselling, particularly for him and the behaviors helium was showing. He lied to maine astir going each week for a month. When I realized that, I was done with him. I had tried everything to marque our matrimony work, and I was walking connected eggshells to effort and marque this antheral happy. He wasn't consenting to bash the bare minimum, and it gave maine support to fto go."

–echeveria_rn

23. "He didn't instrumentality maine to spot the live-action Beauty and the Beast movie erstwhile it came out. Actually, helium laughed astatine the thought erstwhile I suggested we spell spot it. He wasn't adjacent trying to beryllium mean; helium conscionable thought it was truthful unfathomable that helium would ever spell ticker that movie that I indispensable person been joking — adjacent knowing that I'd ever identified HARD with Belle and I loved Emma Watson arsenic Hermione. Plus, I'd talked astir however excited I was for the movie erstwhile we'd seen trailers successful the cinema erstwhile watching each the films HE wanted to see. I'd ne'er felt truthful wholly unseen. Not agelong after, we broke up. I bought myself the DVD, watched it by myself, and sobbed each the mode done it."

–kyridwen

24. "I confided successful my ex that I was unhappy. I was moving each hours to enactment him done his master's degree; I was paying for everything by myself, and inactive had to bash each the cleaning and cooking by myself. I told him I felt overwhelmed, unsupported, and disrespected. We'd had this speech galore times earlier with nary change, contempt trying to enactment applicable solutions successful place. He responded with: 'If we broke up, who would get the ladle?' For the record, I got the ladle. Seeing arsenic I'd paid for each our furnishings and the different things a household requires to function, I took it each with me. Left the spot looking similar a ace den."

–liebackandthinkofeng

25. "He got huffy astatine maine for putting his integrative h2o vessel connected the crushed for a second. He was a small spot of a germaphobe, which I tried hard to accommodate, truthful erstwhile I realized what I did wrong, I tried to apologize and offered to sanitize the vessel for him. He refused and said 'I can't portion from this now,' proceeding to propulsion the half-full vessel away. He past gave maine the stereotypical 'short response' soundless attraction for the adjacent 24 hours. This was my past straw due to the fact that he'd already been nitpicking astatine small things I did for the past six weeks of our relationship, and this conscionable felt similar different 1 of them."

–ThrowRARAw

26. "I asked for a nighttime distant for Christmas. I told him I'd screen each the costs retired of my idiosyncratic account, and each helium had to bash was enactment location with our children, 1 of which was astir 2 and had yet to slumber done the night. (He had ne'er gotten up with the baby, and slept successful a abstracted country truthful helium wouldn't get woken up.) I explained that each I wanted was to read, instrumentality a bath, spell to furniture early, slumber a afloat night, and devour a repast without getting interrupted. He snapped astatine me, saying, 'When you wage each of our bills for astir 2 years, possibly you would merit that.' He didn't wage each of the bills astatine that clip and had ne'er genuinely been the sole income, arsenic I've ever made immoderate magnitude of wealth and had saved considerably for an extended maternity leave. I took the travel anyway, realized however unhappy I'd been, came home, and asked for a divorce. Cheers to the future."

–the-beige-potato

27. "We were long-distance erstwhile I was successful college. It was my past nighttime successful my assemblage town, and I was moving backmost to my hometown (where helium lived) the adjacent day. He was huffy astatine maine due to the fact that I wanted to spell retired with my friends connected my past nighttime successful municipality alternatively of staying location and talking to him connected the phone. I ne'er saw oregon spoke to him again aft that."

–ChogbortsTopStudent

28. "In my 20s, helium and I were unneurotic for 7 years. We lived with my parents, truthful we had 1 country to ourselves. For immoderate holiday, helium decided to acquisition maine a GIANT DJ setup. It had immense speakers and was precise complicated. I've ne'er wanted to beryllium a DJ, and had zero skills oregon involvement successful it. I abruptly realized that helium didn't attraction astir what I wanted, and my full beingness had go astir him, his friends, his band, and his jobs. Then, helium told maine that I enactment my lotion connected incorrect and that's wherefore the hairs connected my limb were lasting up."

–Willing_Dig3158

29. "We were successful a long-distance relationship, and I was excessively sick to spell connected our video chat date. I was truthful ill, I slept for 20 hours successful a azygous day, lone waking up to spell to the bathroom. He was benignant and understanding, up until I got better. Then helium was perfectly fuming astatine maine for bailing connected him. I told him helium wasn't being fair, and explained that I was ace sick. He past started crying astir however he's an atrocious person, and was begging maine to dump him. I dealt with that behaviour for implicit a twelvemonth astatine that point, and I was truthful fed up. I loved him, but each clip we argued, I was successful the incorrect — and past he'd outcry due to the fact that he'd consciousness similar a atrocious person, and would beg maine to interruption up with him. I decided I wasn't going to woody with that anymore."

–LandOfLostSouls

30. "When I recovered retired helium cheated, helium justified it by saying, 'I'm dating aggregate women due to the fact that I wanted to trial retired who is really woman material.' I was not lone hurt, but disgusted...and, like, WTF?! It's benignant of comic to beryllium reminded of however anserine that was."

–countryroad95

31. "I had an ovarian cyst and helium refused to instrumentality maine to time country to person it removed. We had been joined for 15 years and had kids. Done."

–not_triage

32. "He claimed that I shouldn't get upset that helium ne'er showed maine helium loved me, due to the fact that helium didn't bushed maine oregon shriek astatine maine oregon cheat connected me, truthful helium didn't recognize wherefore I acted similar helium was a unspeakable boyfriend. I realized that was each helium truly thought needed to spell into a relationship, and it was fundamentally each helium gave maine implicit 3.5 years."

–WoolieWoolin

33. "I worked from 7 a.m. until 9 p.m. each weekday; helium lone enactment 3–5 hours a time and made $80K much than me. I ever had to inquire him to grip meal earlier I got home, adjacent aft telling him aggregate times that I didn't privation to punctual him. One day, I messaged him asking him to grip dinner, and helium said helium wasn't feeling good capable to navigator oregon drawback something. I told him, 'If you're not capable to cook, could you conscionable propulsion thing successful the microwave?' When I got home, I had crockery and nuggets, portion helium had made himself steak, rice, and sautéed vegetables."

–bussysoup

34. "I had to archer my fellow that I was clinically depressed (for the 4th oregon 5th time), and that I had to determination backmost successful with my parents due to the fact that I virtually didn't person immoderate different options. In response, each helium said portion looking consecutive up was 'just fto maine cognize your plans whenever you cognize them, I guess, truthful it doesn't inconvenience me.' Like, what?! This was the past straw of many, galore straws."

–bitchy_mcguire

35. "My ex and I were hot-and-cold, due to the fact that helium lied a batch and was a cheater. We kept getting backmost together, and each time, I'd plead for him to conscionable archer maine the truth. I felt horrible for continuously suspecting helium was doing something, but helium was truthful evasive. He lied a lot, adjacent astir small things. Finally, erstwhile we were nearing the extremity and helium was trying to support maine from leaving, I was each but exhausted, numb, and checked out. He yet told maine erstwhile helium started cheating — the existent date, and what happened. Up until this point, it had been 5 years of him swearing connected everything that thing happened earlier helium was 'caught,' and that condition was virtually his archetypal accidental to cheat. Once helium told maine the truth, I felt a flood of alleviation that I was correct, and not conscionable paranoid. But I besides felt each my remaining emotion for him yet flush away, and I moved on, much astatine bid than I had been successful the years prior."

–DoughnutAfter6356

36. "When helium looked astatine maine aft I told him I loved him and said, 'I'm not going to accidental that anymore unless I mean it, and with you, I perfectly don't.' There was besides a clip that helium was going connected astir however 'hot I utilized to be' portion I was astir 7–8 months large with twins. I felt truthful freaking terrible... I don't cognize however I stayed truthful long."

–zombiep00

37. "He stonewalled maine for not travelling with him to spot his family. We had talked astir it beforehand, and I had intelligibly told him that portion I wanted to go, I wasn't capable to due to the fact that my sister was getting engaged. He told maine it was good for maine to not spell with him and enactment my sister instead. But erstwhile helium was really away, helium ignored each my connection — not responding to substance messages and not answering immoderate telephone calls. I was truthful confused and hurt. I went to spot him erstwhile helium got back, and helium instantly dumped each of his choler onto maine from his clip with his parents, and wanted maine to comfortableness him. I asked him wherefore helium didn't respond to maine portion helium was away, and helium said helium was huffy astatine maine for not going with him and conscionable didn't privation to speech to me. It truthful intelligibly laid retired that I was conscionable a pawn successful his life. My important events, emotions, and wounded were ne'er going to beryllium important to him — his acquisition would ever beryllium the priority."

–karmanders

38. "He asked maine to instrumentality an online aptitude trial successful his stead for his occupation application, portion helium sat connected his furniture playing FIFA. The trial was conscionable immoderate basal mathematics stuff. Like, it was precocious school-level. At the time, I was finishing an engineering masters degree. When I was done with his aptitude test, helium non-ironically asked if the trial was harder than my assemblage degree."

–Beneficial-Tree2537

39. "He flaked connected gathering my friends. For the archetypal time. On Zoom. Basically, my friends unrecorded acold away, and helium was expected to virtually conscionable them for the precise archetypal time, aft I'd already met with his friends respective times successful person. We virtually planned this meetup for him to beryllium introduced to them. He didn't respond each time erstwhile I told him I was excited and confirmed the time; then, astatine the past minute, helium said helium was excessively bushed from enactment to marque it. And past helium went connected to play video games with his friends."

–Chaptersofbooks

40. "As soon arsenic we arrived location from the infirmary aft I miscarried, helium locked himself up successful our chamber to jerk off. And successful the evening, I had to thrust myself to the pharmacy to get my medicine and immoderate nutrient due to the fact that helium couldn't adjacent fuss getting them for me; helium was 'too busy' watching sports. It's been six months since the miscarriage and helium asked for a divorcement 3 weeks ago. The nervus connected that guy!"

–alextaur

41. "I deliberation the emotion was agelong gone by this point, but this is what made maine driblet the charade that I was, successful fact, inactive successful love: We were FaceTiming 1 night, and I was trying to person a superior speech astir thing that had happened to maine earlier that day. But helium was truthful goddamn stoned that helium wasn't adjacent listening to me, and alternatively was laughing astatine himself trying to tongue-f*ck his carnivore graham crackers. I'll ne'er day a stoner again. Ever."

–Bored_Llama207

42. "My past straw was the time helium told maine to spell get a f*ck-buddy due to the fact that helium was bushed of maine nagging astatine him astir having sex. We hadn't done thing since our lad was conceived. Our lad was 2 years aged astatine the time."

–No1NozMe

43. "He told maine to halt being clingy erstwhile I was trying to cuddle and flirt with him. We'd been successful a narration and surviving unneurotic for 2 years astatine that point, and the passionateness and intimacy was gone. I was clinging to anticipation that we could get it back. I knew it was implicit aft that."

–NaughtiestTimeline

What was your "last straw" that made you recognize your narration was over? Men and women, stock your communicative successful this anonymous form, oregon successful the comments below.

And cheque retired BuzzFeed Canada connected Instagram and TikTok for more.

Note: Some responses person been edited for magnitude and/or clarity.